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Saturday, April 30, 2005

OIL FOR CIGARS PROGRAM LAUNCHED 
Ignoring the economic interests of his people, Hugo Chavez, the Communist dictator of Venezuela, has formed a pact with Fidel Castro that seeks to undercut the U.S.-backed Free Trade Area of the Americas plan. The American plan seeks to liberalize trade barriers within the Western Hemisphere. By contrast, the Castro-Chavez plan, entitlted the Bolivian Alternative for the Americas, is based upon the sound economic principles of Marxism.

At this point, the main feature of the Castro-Chavez plan is for Venezuela to give away oil and goods to Cuba, in exchange for, uhh, hmm..... Well, that part is unclear, although it looks like Cuba could probably spare a few cigars and doctors--that's all they make. Oh, I forgot, they also have a lot of classic cars, largely because no one there has been able to afford anything newer since the 1950s, except the Communist leadership, of course. Given the huge economic advantages of the plan, there is little doubt that other nations in the region will be lining up to get in on the deal.

With the Castro-Chavez plan in place, it looks like the Venezuelan people have a lot to look forward to. Although 80% of them live in poverty, they will have the satisfaction of being Cuba's greatest benefactor, and can be certain that this arrangement will be memorialized in huge, pompus ceremonies held by the Communist elite of both countries. When times get tough, all the Venezuelan worker will have to do is think, "If just one more army uniform can be put on a Cuban soldier's back, it was all worth it."
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